Good day to you all!
I would like to impart some wisdom on what is becoming a particularly popular online presence, that being the world of online dating. My room mate and I joined a website called POF, acronym for the website Plenty of Fish. First issue I had was right there, I kept wanting to call it FOP, to which a flop this whole experience has been. But nonetheless I signed up and completed the online compatibility and personality tests which brings me to issue two, it took an hour and a half to complete just these tests. Add this on to the extra 45 minutes to resize the photos and find a suitable and not at all pretentious username and you've taken 2 hours plus to create a profile. In this time, I could have gone to a bar in central London and met someone in the flesh. Not by judging someone wholly on a picture.
Issue three comes from the personal description part of this whole set depreciating process. Im not entirely sure if this is just me but I had the issue that I needed to write enough to not be considered a fake profile, but not as much to come across as a psycho who shares their life history online! Rewind to the part where empty personal descriptions make me wary. An empty one makes me extremely nervous. I feel like the person who has written it is not in fact a 22 year old trainee lawyer but a 50 year old sex slave ring leader. Call me Anxious Annie or Cautious Clare but i've seen too many CSI's to trust an empty personal description box.
Issue four: photos, both my own and others. My photo choices are not very varied. I'm not extremely photogenic and shy away from the camera pretty much always. So finding a photo of me that I like and is not one of me where I'm gurning in the background is extremely difficult. Especially since I'm morally outraged and against selfies. And then onto the topic of other people's photos, if you put up one photo that is a black and white head shot, then I will assume your a creepy 50 year old. Put up 5 selfies, and I will assume your a self-obsessed prick. And put up 5 photos of you out on nights out, topless with 7 girls, then I know your a self-obsessed slut.
Issue 5: The whole concept of online dating. That your basing your decision on a picture. I am guilty of this and is a reason I hate myself, and try not to but thats just something I have to accept is a reality. Even dating in real life, I hate judging someones personality based on what they look like... ugh hating myself for writing this but its the harsh truth! But during the online dating process, theres a part when this judging is intensified by a hundred. On POF there is a app and on this is a part called 'Meet Me' where a series of photos come up to which you respond with a Yes or No. I hate this with every inch of my being and the whole idea is so self depreciating! Won't continue with this rant as nothing more will be written through angst.
Issue 6: First dates. You literally have no idea who you are meeting up with. They could be anyone, you don't have any idea if they actually look like their picture and you could be kidnapped right there off the streets. Adding another name to my list here, Suspicious Sally. Also, the other end of this, is the fear that you are not what they got from your pictures or personal description and that there will be the awkward 'ahh nice to meet you stranger who has a capability to look completely different in person than on the photo'.
Issue 7 is the last but most infuriating point, that people just drop off the face of the earth! I was texting someone for about a week, promises of meeting up and had spent the whole week talking to each other. He managed to find and add me on Facebook and we had plans to meet. Then, out of nowhere, did not get a good morning text and never heard from him again. My stalker tendencies have kicked in and made me not delete him off Facebook but nonetheless frustrating!
So I hope you have enjoyed my imparting wisdom. And I depart telling you this, don't bother with the hassle of it all! Go out, meet a person not a CV and don't fret about the complications of it all!
Love and Hugs
Anxious Annie, Cautious Clare and Suspicious Sally
xx
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