The one when its me

Oh hey, theres a picture that is indeed me!

This post is most definitely fuelled by some dutch courage in the form of the bottle of wine that has been consumed and the fact the video I filmed is extremely embarrassing!

So, why you ask, have I decided now to show you who I am. Well, I can tell you its not because I have hit a milestone of followers or views, or that an opportunity has arisen that will need me to show myself. More that I decided that it was about time I don't let fear rule my life.

I have always been fearful of judgement in particular. And I have shied away from confrontation or opportunities in which people have an open opportunity to judge me. And something today clicked and made me realise that that is not what I want to be the deciding factor in my life. It's not fair to be someone I'm not just to please the masses. I'd rather be happy and myself than be acting my way through life and liked. Confidence doesn't come from being outspoken and extreme, it comes from being happy from within. You can be shy and confident at the same time. If you have confidence in who you are and how you carry yourself then that is the greatest form of confidence. And that should be the only one that matters. I cannot stress to you enough that happiness comes from within. As much as you persuade yourself that you are happy does not mean that you are. I am a strong believer of making yourself happy and radiating confidence from within. You cannot be confident and happy if your pretending to be someone your not, and I've realised that being a shell of yourself will only result in you living as a shell of yourself in the long run. I have decided to get rid of the people who have expectations of me being someone I'm not and starting anew only being me. Thus, showing all of you who that is.

I have been increasingly aware that the amount of online presence from young people are from people who are a size 10 or smaller, with flawless skin and nice clothes and good hair, and I wanted to show young people that you don't need that to be happy. I am by no means slim, nor do I have flawless skin and I don't want to, my hair is crazy and I love my primark jumpers. I wouldn't call myself ugly but then again I don't think that anyone should consider themselves to be either. Ugly shouldn't be a physical characteristic, no one should feel the authority to class anyone as pretty or not, if you do feel the need to do that, then you are indeed ugly, you have an ugly personality and that is the part that matters. Anyway, back to the point at hand. I wanted to be a person young people can relate to and make them know that its okay not to look perfect. Being healthy is very different to being slim or a size 8.

So, with that, my name is Jordan. I am 20, I live in London, I study criminology and I love food. I am a size 16 and am proud to say I'm healthy. I enjoy veg and healthy meals but like everyone I love the occasional treat in the form of chocolate! Feel a bit like I'm in an AA meeting!

Hope you enjoyed!

Jordan xx